As many mothers who experienced natural birth could attest that their birthing experience transformed their lives, many would probably tell you ‘the moment I held my baby in my arms, I totally forgot about the labour pain’!
There is a shift in consciousness and many aspects of their lives change due to this transformation during birthing. The perspective of paradigm shift could give an insight on how our humanity will transform into the unity, harmony and love through a positive birthing experience.
Many years of my work has come down to dealing with fears. It happens to many women that because the fear, they miss a great life gift to be a mother. Because of the fear, many also have to pay a fortune in the hospital enduring painful treatment and sometimes results in traumatic operations. Because of the fear, they don’t get to enjoy one of the MOST wonderful moment of their lives, the birth of their precious baby!
But, these are all preventable, if they are informed before birth.
We humans have the highest evolution and we also are the only species in the mammals world who doubt our ability to give birth naturally. These doubts, anxieties and fears are the enemies of a calm, safe and peaceful birth. We need to deal with them before the birth so that the birth won’t leave a traumatic imprint, not only on the mother, but also on the baby.
I have gone across the world in search of my dream birth. I was scared when I first conceived my baby in South America. I went across Europe, Asia and then Hawaii. One of the reasons was that I wanted to be in an environment where I could feel loved, supported and be gently treated. I couldn’t find it even back to my home country. I was surprised by how pregnant women were coldly treated in the hospitals, only 5 mins scan and check-up was allowed and no questions could be asked. It was heartbreaking for me to be treated as a soulless machine.
As I was told by friends and family that birth was something horrible and dangerous, I checked with my heart and a voice from deeper within didn’t want to believe that. I knew it was possible for a more positive experience. Although I have to admit, it was very scary for me. I was having my first baby and didn’t know what to expect from a birth. I somehow knew that natural birth is something achievable. I knew I didn’t need any drugs or medication as all animals can do it without, why we humans can’t?
the key is to shift from negative to positive birth stories!
I believe I have this hope inside me and it helped me go through a journey in Hawaii to be surrounded by people who have positive views about birth. That was what I needed to hear and wanted be assured.
During my last month of pregnancy, I was swimming with dolphins and reading a book with positive birth stories by Ina May Gaskin- Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth. It was perfect for me as I didn’t want to connect to the fear and negativity that media was presenting.
What is the opposite of fear?
I was sure that I can create something positive, something outside of the normal belief system. I set my intention to read these positive stories everyday and wanted to connect to this vibration. I knew only doing that wasn’t enough, I also had to go through all my fears, to face them and solve them before birth. I believe this work had done a great job in the creation of my drug-free and beautiful natural birth.
I wanted to share with you in this blog about how powerful these birth stories can be. They serve you as an inspiration so that you are more likely to be convinced that you can have a wonderful birth as well.
It is tremendously helpful to talk about your beliefs on how birth can or cannot be a wonderful experience.
• Is there any voice inside you telling you that birth is a horrible thing or a scary event? Write it down, and let it out. We will talk to that voice and go deeper into it.
• Is there any possibility now in your consciousness that birth can be wonderful?
• What does your wonderful birth look like?
• Do you think you can achieve your ideal birth? Can you create it or do you think it just happens to you?
• How do you think you can have a wonderful birth experience?
Here I am going to share with you my 7 secrets to create the desired birth:
- Open yourself to discover different ways of giving birth, allow yourself to boldly dream about how you want to welcome your precious baby to the world in greatest details.Where? With who? What happens in the birth? How it happens? When?
- Envision and feel the excitement how amazing it is for your baby to be delivered in the perfect way you want it to be. Feel the actual sensations in your body; do you feel warmth in your heart when you envision the dream or tingles of energy all over your body? You are a powerful being, you not only create your baby’s life, and you create your way of welcoming him or her. Feel how wonderful it is to give birth painlessly, naturally.
- Look at your doubts and fears about your birth, write them down and deal with them so they don’t show up when your baby comes. It is important to feel and go through your fears BEFORE the actual birth. Be aware and analyse the fears that you choose to believe from people’s negative opinions or dreadful experiences, are they real? Can you be absolutely sure they will happen to you?
- Totally accept that dream birth is possible and that it can happen to you. Your integration of body, mind and spirit generates a successful and painless birth.Birth is a wonderful experience; it is a spiritual, physical and mental healing journey that life is giving you. It is not a fearful and painful event.
- Focus your intention on creating the best result for your birth. Trust and respect your body and listen to your inner voice, your wisdom.
- Take action to start your dream pregnancy today. Imaging you experiencing wonderful pregnancy, feeling calm and strong. Act as if you already had a wonderful dream birth. Who do you talk to about it with? What do you say about it to show how excited and happy you are?
7. Let go of the pressure, and enjoy whatever life brings you. Know that you can have your dream birth and whether it happens or not, you are absolutely happy. Remove your expectations that your birth has to be exactly the way you want it to be.
Once you go through the process and get inspired by the beautiful positive stories, it is easier for you to believe that birth can be beautiful, non-traumatic or even transformative. If it is difficult for your brain to let go of your fear, think of dolphins, take them as a reminder of how you could live, as an intellectual and spiritual being. The dolphins taught me lessons repetitively about how to Trust, Love and Surrender. This shift has changed my birth and life forever.
The key is really about change of perception around birth, instead of connecting to fear and thinking it is a painful event, shift to a consciousness that welcomes birth as it is actually the first moment, unforgettable moment that you are going to meet your baby. It will be a moment of Love, not fear.
It is not to say that you pretend to be positive that you are not afraid. Instead, really go through doubts, feel the fear and listen to the nagging voices completely. Then, you consciously decide that you want things to go well for you and for your baby! And SO IT IS!
If you are interested to know more about how to go deeper and resolve your fears (sometimes unknown), visit Ally’s program below.